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Title: The Demon Within 1/2
Fandom: Slayers
Rating: T
Pairings/Warnings: Um...gen?
Summary: Zel finds an unexpected cure with an unexpected price.
Notes: This is an old fic, but I like it. Still, not great so...be warned for general mediocrity. Also, there are no pairings in this fic, really. None.


“It’s quiet,” Lina Inverse whispered to her companions as they softly made their way through the bushes. “Too quiet for a monster to be around.” She strained her ears, listening for the slightest rustle of leaves.

“Lina, I’m bored!” Gourry’s voice made her jump several feet in the air. She whirled and fixed the blond swordsman with her death glare.

“You scared me, jellyfish brain!” Immediately, Lina began pounding Gourry for his stupidity.

“Ow! You really shouldn’t--ouch! That hurt! Ow!”

“You think that hurt? What about this?!”

“Ow! Yes!”

“Uh....Ms.Lina?” Amelia ventured nervously, sweatdropping. “Ms.Lina? Don’t you think you might be scaring away the monster? We can’t fight for justice against it if you scare it away.”

Lina turned her death glare on Amelia, who immediately shrunk back against Zelgadis. He stared darkly at the entire group.

“I can’t believe I agreed to this,” he grumbled, moving away. “I’m leaving. I still need to find my cure, and I won’t get any further in doing so by capturing a rogue monster.”

“Don’t go, Mr. Zelgadis!” Amelia pleaded. “Don’t you want to fight for justice with us?”

“I have better things to do than this,” Zel grumbled, stepping out of the bushes.

From behind him came a guttural growl, and suddenly a black streak was upon him. Zel was thrown to the ground. He rolled onto his back and was suddenly pinned to the ground by a clawed, fanged monster with a glowing red jewel in its forehead. Its curved incisors formed what might have been a smile as it slammed its claws against his neck, obviously intending to rip his throat out. Zelgadis smiled grimly as the creature’s claws raked harmlessly at his stone skin. Then there came a cry from nearby.

“Fireball!” A flaming red ball flew towards the monster. It dived off of Zelgadis, throwing itself to one side. Zel sat up and glanced over at Lina, who was preparing for another fireball even as Gourry unsheathed his sword. Amelia glanced over at Zel and started to run towards him.

“Mr. Zelgadis, are you all--” She was cut off as the monster, sensing easier prey, dived at her, throwing her to the ground. Its claws dug into her arms, and it looked pleased when red blood flowed out. Its claws moved for her throat even as Amelia struggled to move her arms and call up a spell.

“Flare arrow!” Zelgadis’s spell attack hit the monster in the side. It fell off of Amelia, then propped itself up on one misshapen limb, its red eyes glowing in anger as it stared at Zel.

“Freeze arrow!” Lina launched another spell attack at it. This time the monster dodged too slow, and one of its clawed hands was impaled by the spear. Before it could try to attack Lina, Gourry brought his sword down by its neck. The monster managed to get away just before the swordsman could decapitate it. With an angry hiss, the creature sped off into the woods with supernatural speed.

“We can’t let it get away!” Lina said even as she knelt next to Amelia, checking the girl’s wounds.

“Keep an eye on her!” Zel ordered, then used his own demon speed to follow the monster.

“Zel, wait!” He ignored Lina’s cry as he sped through the forest, following the blood trail left by the creature. He slowed as he neared a creek. Carefully peering through the bushes, he saw the monster leaning over the water, drinking deep. Its green-black blood stained the leaves beneath it. Smiling grimly, Zel reached down for his sword.

The monster looked up as Zel took his sword from its scabbard. It hissed as the chimera advanced, sword drawn. It crouched, preparing to spring. Zelgadis smiled.

“No chance,” he stated grimly, even as the creature attacked.

Its weight was more than Zelgadis had anticipated, and he was forced to the ground. The creature scratched at his stone skin, leaning most of its weight on Zelgadis’s sword arm, obviously trying to force him to drop the sword. Zelgadis reached up with his free hand and hit the creature hard in its already injured side. The monster’s green-black blood streamed down Zel’s arm, but the chimera ignored it. The creature staggered, sliding off Zel.

“Fireball!” The fireball hit the monster in the legs, causing it to topple to the ground. Zel moved forward slowly, deliberately, bringing up his sword as he advanced.

The monster made one last-ditch effort to escape. Zel caught it effortlessly, holding it back with his bare hands. The monster screamed in irritation as its teeth and claws raked harmlessly at Zel’s smooth skin. Its blood poured down onto Zelgadis’s body. The chimera swung his sword once. It bit deep into the monster’s neck, then easily severed the head from the body. More blood washed over Zel as the creature fell over dead.

Zelgadis pulled back with a disgusted look on his face. His entire body was sticky with the monster’s blood. He tried to wipe it off, but to no avail--his hands were just as dirty as the rest of him. Suddenly, the creature’s blood began to pulse and glow with a hot green light. Zelgadis cried out in pain as it burned into his skin, searing his stone flesh. His head spun with pain, and he fell to his knees. It felt as if he was being pulled apart and burned to death at the same time. His eyes closed, and he blacked out.

He came to only a few minutes later, his head still spinning. His eyes opened slightly, then closed immediately as the light hurt them. He was aware that there was something wrong with him, but he wasn’t sure what. That was when he felt claws at his throat.

The monster? he wondered dizzily. That’s impossible, I severed its head...

That was all he had time to think before the claws pierced his flesh, making him gasp. He was vaguely aware that the monster shouldn’t have been able to harm him, that he shouldn’t be in pain at all, but everything was drowned out by the agony and the blood pouring down his neck. Before he blacked out once more, he was, strangely, aware of someone kissing his forehead and promising him that death would be sweet....

***

“Hey! Hey, are you all right?” The words forced their way through the fog that covered Zel’s brain. He knew that voice, yet he couldn’t place it. Everything was waves and stars, and the haze in his brain made it hard to think. He struggled with his memory, trying to recall what he had been doing and why he was lying on his back with strange, dark shapes hovering over him, talking to him.

I remember....Lina. That’s Lina’s voice. One mystery solved. The clouds in Zel’s mind were slowly parting as rational thought broke through. We were hunting a monster ...it attacked Amelia and I chased it...cut off its head....got covered in blood...then? Then what? He couldn’t recall, his head was still spinning. Everything was upside down and filled with perfumed haze. I remember...or think I remember....a kiss. And a promise of death...

His eyes snapped open in sudden fear. He tried to sit upright, but the moment he did the world spun before his eyes. Lina appeared before him, forcing him to lie back down on the soft bed.

“L-Lina...?” Zel was surprised to hear his voice. It was thin and hoarse, and only then did he notice how dry his throat was. Gathering his memories again, he ventured a hesitant question. “Amelia? Is she okay?”

“You know Amelia?” Lina sounded surprised, which confused Zelgadis. Of course he knew Amelia! What was wrong with her?

“Lina? Don’t you know me?” Zel questioned.

“You know me too, huh?” Lina stared intensely at him. “Why don’t you tell us who you are, so we’ll be on equal ground? And then maybe you can tell us if you’ve seen a friend of ours who disappeared into the woods. You had his sword near you when we found you.”

“Lina, don’t you recognize...” Suddenly, Zelgadis touched his face and gasped. He felt smooth skin. Not stone. Skin. Glancing down at his trembling hands, he saw that they, too, were made of human flesh. An impossible hope rose in his throat. “No...” he whispered, barely able to believe it. Suddenly, he swung his feet over the edge of the bed and stood, swaying weakly.

“Hey, wait a sec, you should stay in bed--” Lina moved to stop him, but he staggered away from her towards the mirror on the wall. He stared at his reflection, wide- eyed with disbelief.

“I--I’m--” Zelgadis tried to speak but words failed him. A slow smile crept onto his face. He wanted to yell for joy, but his throat was too dry. He heard Lina behind him and whirled to face her, still smiling like a madman.

“Hey, are you okay?” Lina looked at him nervously.

“Lina...” Zel shook his head. “It’s me. Zelgadis. I’m.....I’m cured!” He touched his face again, reveling in the forgotten feeling of his own skin.

“Zel?” Lina seemed torn between amazement and disbelief. “That’s....that can’t be you!” She moved forward, one hand outstretched as if to touch his face.

“It is me. The me before Rezo cursed me.” Zel turned away again, staring at his reflection once more. His human face smiled back at him, and Zelgadis felt light-headed and giddy with joy. After all this time, he was finally human again.

“I-I can’t believe it.” Lina moved to stand beside him. “How did it happen?”

“I don’t know, I--” Zel suddenly swayed as memory assaulted him. Unfeeling claws, cold like steel, tearing into his throat....warm blood flowing down his neck....and a kiss. The kiss stood out in his mind. The kiss and the promise that went with it.

As if sensing Zel’s sudden weakness, Lina steadied him and led him to a nearby chair. He collapsed into it, putting his hands to his head.

“I--I remember fighting the monster,” Zel told her in a low voice. “I got covered in the thing’s blood, but I managed to chop its head off.”

“We know,” Lina said. “Gourry, Amelia and I found its body near yours by the creek. But you were hurt. Your throat...”

Zelgadis’s hands wandered unconsciously up to his neck. The flesh was smooth and unmarred, so he knew that Lina or Amelia had used a healing spell on him.

“The creature didn’t do that,” Zel said. He closed his eyes as memory washed over him. “After I killed it, I tried to wash off its blood. But it started to burn, and I felt it even through my stone skin. It felt like I was coming apart.” His eyes opened with sudden understanding. “The monster’s blood! Of course! That’s what cured me!”

“Then how were you wounded?” Lina asked. “Your throat was torn something awful. Amelia and I had to combine our energy to heal it and get the blood out of your lungs.”

“I don’t know what attacked me,” Zel said honestly. “I must have blacked out when the transformation occurred. When I woke up, the light hurt my eyes, so I kept them closed. Then something attacked me. I don’t know what.” He shuddered at the memory. “I remember its claws at my throat, tearing at my neck. And....it’s strange, but I remember, or think I remember, someone kissing my forehead and telling me death would be sweet. The voice was strange. I recognized it, but at the same time I didn’t. I don’t know what it was.”

“When we found you, there was no sign of anything but the battle between you and the monster,” Lina said. “We thought that you were some kid who had gotten caught in the aftermath of the battle. I had Amelia take you back to this inn to get healed while Gourry and I looked for....well, for you. We thought you might have been dragged off or something, then decided that maybe you left to look for your cure and didn’t feel like saying good-bye. We thought that when you woke up, you could tell us where, uh, where you went? This is kinda hard to explain.”

“I can’t blame you for not recognizing me,” Zel admitted. “I barely recognized myself at first. It’s been so long since....” He stopped, overcome by emotions. Lina regarded him intently for a moment, then dragged him to his feet.

“Come on,” she said with a wide smile. “Let’s go downstairs and show your new look off to Amelia and Gourry. I’m sure Amelia will be very impressed.” She grinned mischievously at Zel’s suddenly worried look. “And then we can get something to eat. The innkeeper’s giving us free food for killing the monster, and since you’re the one who killed it, you deserve some of the munchies.”

“All right.” Reluctantly, Zel allowed Lina to drag him downstairs. Amelia and Gourry were sitting at a table in the dining room, waiting for Lina. She wove her way through the crowd to their table, dragging Zelgadis behind her.

“Hi Ms.Lina!” Amelia waved brightly.

“Can we order now?” Gourry complained.

“First, I have an introduction to make.” Lina pushed Zel in front of her. “Gourry, Amelia, meet the new, improved Zelgadis Graywords. In the flesh.”

“Zelgadis?!” Amelia stared at him in open-mouthed shock. “You’re...you’re...”

“Really dirty!” Gourry finished for her, and the other three facevaulted. Lina
groaned and shook her head.

“He’s human again, idiot!” she yelled at him.

“Oh. That too,” Gourry said. Lina growled at him and waved over a waitress. She motioned for Zel to sit as she ordered several portions of everything on the menu.

Zel sighed and sat down. Glancing at his cloak, he saw that Gourry was right. The once-white fabric was now dark with mud and blood stains.

“Mr. Zelgadis, is that really you?” Amelia touched his face in wonder. “You’re not stone anymore! I’m so happy for you!” She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him so tightly that it took him a few minutes to pry her off.

“Um...thank you, Amelia,” he said, coughing in embarrassment.

“How’d it happen?” Amelia asked.

“Monster blood,” Zel said succinctly, not really in the mood to talk. In truth, he had just noticed how hungry he was. As a chimera, he had not needed as much food as he had as a human, and it seemed as if his body was ready to catch up on all those missed meals.

Several waitresses showed up and covered the table with as much food as it could hold. Immediately, Gourry and Lina attacked and started eating everything in sight. Amelia and Zel had to hurry to grab some food for themselves before it was snatched up by the sorceress and swordsman.

“Wow, you’re actually eating!” Amelia said to Zelgadis in surprise.

“Being human makes you hungry,” Zel said with a shrug. “I never needed much nourishment as a chimera, but now....well, I suppose all the excitement has made me hungry.” He smiled to himself. He had missed even the simple sensation of hunger.

Lina and Gourry were on their fourth helping of everything when a woman suddenly burst into the inn, screaming and crying.

“Demon! Please, somebody help me! A demon has attacked us!”

Lina and company exchanged glances.

“Don’t worry,” Lina said, standing up and facing the woman. “Zel killed the monster earlier today.”

“Impossible!” The woman shook her head. “I just saw it! It destroyed my husband’s butcher shop and killed him!”

“Mr. Zelgadis, are you sure you killed it?” Amelia asked. Immediately, everyone in the room looked at Zelgadis, who squirmed under their scrutiny, even as he silently reminded himself that he was human and had nothing to fear from their gaze.

“I cut off its head,” he said in a matter-of-fact tone. He glanced at Lina, Amelia and Gourry. “You three saw its corpse yourselves.”

“Could it have regenerated, Ms. Lina?” Amelia suggested.

“I guess,” Lina said thoughtfully. “But that seems kinda weird. I mean, its head was off. And it was a regular monster, not a Mazoku, so the head-chopping thing should have killed it. Regular monsters aren’t much different from trolls and the like, and even a troll gets killed when you cut its head off.”

“Maybe it’s another monster,” Gourry said off-handedly. Everyone exchanged glances.

“A dim bulb brightens,” Zel muttered.

“Why didn’t we think of that?” Lina wondered.

“Think of what?” Gourry asked. Lina slapped her forehead in frustration.

“This monster could be the other one’s mate,” Amelia suggested. “Maybe it’s mad that Mr. Zelgadis killed its boyfriend--or girlfriend--and it attacked him, and now it’s coming after him to exact its own perverted, evil monster-type justice.”

“Then why didn’t it kill Zel by the creek?” Lina stated.

“Maybe it thought he was dead?” Amelia shrugged.

“Whatever it is, we may as well stop it,” Zelgadis said, rising. “I’ll go get my sword.”

“We’ll wait for you down here,” Lina said, and went to ask the woman for directions to her shop.

Zel walked up the steps and went to the room where he had awakened earlier. His sword was leaning against the wall, still covered in dried demon blood. He clasped the scabbard, ready to hook it onto his belt like usual.

And was shocked when its weight practically dragged him to the ground. Zel stared at it in surprise. As a chimera, the sword hadn’t felt heavy at all. Now it was almost too heavy.

“If I can’t carry the scabbard, perhaps I should just carry the sword,” Zel decided. He drew his sword, only to find that it too was heavy. He could lift it, but the blade wobbled and his arms trembled with effort. No longer could he wield it with the fluid ease he had used before.

“Dammit!” Zelgadis cursed bitterly as he dropped the sword. He sunk down into a chair, sighing. He stared at his human hands. “I am finally human....but I’m the same weakling I was before Rezo changed me. I can’t even lift my own sword.” He face twisted in an expression of self disgust as he stood. He had told Lina and the others that he would help them, so help them he would. All he needed was a lighter sword.

“Zel?” Lina was surprised to see Zel stomping down the steps in foul humor. “What’s wrong? Where’s your sword?”

“I need a new one,” Zel muttered as he swept past her. “That one’s too heavy. Go on without me. I’ll catch up.”

“Zel! Wait!” Lina started to follow him, but he was already out the door.

“I’ll catch up!” he called as he strode quickly down the street towards the nearest weapons shop.

Lina sighed and turned to Gourry and Amelia.

“You heard him,” she said. “Let’s go.”

While Lina, Gourry, and Amelia made their way towards the butcher shop, Zelgadis wandered through the streets, looking for a place to buy a sword. When he had first stepped outside, he had nearly pulled on his hood out of habit., but had stopped himself before he could. Even though he was human now, it still felt odd to walk through the streets unhooded, where everyone could look upon him. It was strange not to be stared at. As much as he had always loathed those stares, it was an odd feeling to finally be no more than a face in the crowd.

He was passing by an old, run-down building when a shadow flitted by just in Zelgadis’s peripheral vision. Zel whirled, looking around for whatever it had been that he saw. The streets behind him were filled with people going about their everyday business. Zel scanned the crowd, then looked away.

Probably just a cat, he thought. I’m so used to being noticed that anonymity is making me jumpy.

That was when something dived at him from a nearby alleyway. Zel might have been able to dodge it as a chimera, but without his demon speed and strength, he was easily pulled off the streets and dragged into the closed building nearby. He didn’t know what had grabbed him. It had one clawed hand over his eyes and the other over his mouth. Zel struggled futilely in its grip for a moment. Then he was suddenly dropped face down onto a pile of foul-smelling straw. He took a moment to spit the straw out of his mouth, then turned to face his captor. The creature stood in the shadows, watching him with burning crimson eyes.

“Who are you?” Zelgadis demanded. “What do you want with me?”

“Who are we?” The voice was eerily familiar, and it chilled Zelgadis to the bone as he realized who he was talking to. The creature moved out of the shadows into the light, smiling evilly. “We’re you.”

Zelgadis stared at it in open revulsion. The creature did, indeed, resemble his cursed self, but with several fundamental differences. Its hands were lengthened into long, curving claws, as were its feet. Spines of stone stuck out of its back, and it had a long, lizard-like tail. It wore no clothes and appeared to have no gender. The body was covered from head to toe in stone patches just like those Zelgadis had once had, and its hair was the same purple wire as his had been, even in the same style. But the face was the worst. That face had haunted Zel’s nightmares ever since he was transformed. It was his face...but completely devoid of any humanity. It was the face Zelgadis had feared to see every time he looked in the mirror. The face of the demon. The demon, without that trace of humanity that had always touched Zel’s features. Just an evil, heartless demon, right down to its shining red eyes.

“What’s wrong, Zelgadis?” the demon taunted. “Disgusted by your own face?” Its voice was strange, but as familiar as the face. It was two voices at once, and Zelgadis had heard both voices in his nightmares and even, at times, in his head while he was wide awake. It was the voice of the golem and the voice of the demon, both mocking him.

The demon saw in Zelgadis’s face that he understood who he was talking to, and smiled viciously.

“That’s right.” It nodded. “The demon and the golem, finally free of the weakling human who kept us at bay.” It laughed, and the sound made Zelgadis shudder. “We were so happy to finally be free of you. It was you who always held us back, you know. We tried to show you the way you should be, the way to truly be strong, but you never listened. You never had the strength to embrace that dark part of yourself. It was like a breath of fresh air to be finally free of you. Because we hate you. We hate you more than anything in this world.”

“Then why didn’t you kill me?” Zel asked. “Why didn’t you kill me by the creek? You had to know that Lina and the others would find me.”

“Of course we knew. We cannot kill you, and you cannot kill us, because we are you, and you are us. Even now.” The demon regarded him with interest. “We hate you and we want you dead. But we love you too, because you were us and will always be. We love you so much that we want you to be in pain. To hurt. To scream in horror. Because we love you. And we will hate you forever.”

Zel shook his head. That was the golem speaking, he knew. The golem always spoke to him in riddles, as if it was never sure whether to help or hinder him. The demon, on the other hand, wanted him to die, and so was always blunt.

“So I can’t kill you,” Zel said. “But Lina can. Gourry and Amelia can. I don’t need to kill you.”

“They can kill us,” the creature affirmed. “But to kill us would be to kill you. They won’t do that. We know you, Zelgadis. We are you. Even our name is as yours: we are Gadis.” It smiled again. “And you fear us. We see it in your pathetic human eyes. You fear us.”

Zelgadis noticed then that he had been shaking. He tried to stop himself, but it was impossible. His body refused to stop trembling as the monster circled him like a cat circling its prey.

“Poor weakling human,” Gadis said, shaking its head in disappointment. “Were you what held us back all that time? We could never overpower you then. But now...now you seem like nothing to us. Just a pathetic, weak little bug. We are not afraid of you now.”

“I’m not afraid of you!” Zelgadis cried angrily, but his voice sounded scared and pathetic even to his ears. The abomination before him laughed in amusement.

“You are afraid,” it stated calmly. “We can smell it. We can hear it. We can even see it as you tremble. It pours off your body in waves. We know that you are only a frightened little boy who can do nothing against us. All your spells are ours. All your knowledge is ours. And you have no weapon.”

Zelgadis looked down at his human hands and cursed. As Gadis said, he had no sword, and his human strength would do nothing against this creature. All he had left was his magic and, if the monster spoke true, it could perform all his spells. But he had to try. He prepared for a fireball.

The monster smirked.

“Flare arrow!” it called, and Zelgadis barely managed to avoid the attack. He stared at the monster with wide eyes. Gadis regarded him smugly. “We are you, Zelgadis. We know what you plan to do before you do it. You are as predictable as always. And you seem to have forgotten that we are as invulnerable as you once were. But now, you are nothing more than weak human flesh. We can rend your flesh, but you can do no harm to us.”

Gadis smiled once more, and advanced on the human before him. Zelgadis’s mind worked frantically trying to find some method of escape. But he knew that there was none. This creature had his former strength, his former speed, and access to all of his spells. He was helpless. The monster reached for him. Its claws scored his face, just below his eyes, and a trickle of blood ran down like a tear. Zelgadis flinched, then saw the monster nod in satisfaction. He straightened, resolving not to give this monster the satisfaction of hearing him scream.

Gadis seemed to have sensed this new resolve, and it was obviously angered. Placing one clawed hand on Zel’s shoulder, it swiftly and efficiently dislocated Zel’s shoulder. Zelgadis bit his lip but did not cry out.

“Give in to the pain,” the abomination hissed. “We are waiting to hear you scream.”

“Then you’ll wait forever,” Zel stated adamantly.

“We’ll see.” Gadis scowled and grabbed Zel’s hand. Quickly, it snapped one of the human’s fingers. Zelgadis tensed, but refused to cry out.

Snap! Another finger. Zelgadis shuddered. He had to get away. An idea slowly formed in his pain-filled brain. As Gadis snapped another finger, he swayed weakly and fell backwards pretending to faint. The creature seemed so certain of his weakness, and Zel hoped that it might fall for the trick.

The monster caught Zel as he fell backwards, preparing to wake him with more pain. As it started to reposition the human, Zel gathered power in his good hand.

“Fireball!” He hit Gadis in the stomach with the spell. The monster growled in pain and anger, losing its hold on its captive. Zel felt a sudden pain in his stomach, as if he, too, had been hit by a fireball. Somehow, he managed to pull himself to his feet and run for the door. Gadis moved to follow, but Zelgadis had already prepared another spell to deter it. Closing his eyes, he cried out, “Lighting!”

A ball of light burst from his fingertips. Gadis fell back, howling, one arm over its eyes. While it was distracted, Zel turned and ran out of the building. The moment he was out in the open, he sprinted for the end of the street and didn’t stop running until he was surrounded by people.

“It won’t follow me,” Zelgadis murmured feverishly. “I know it. I was it. It will avoid crowds, just as I did. For now, I’m safe. I....” He swayed on his feet as a wave of dizziness and nausea washed over him. He glanced down at his right hand. His right shoulder had been the one dislocated, and, with his fingers broken, he could barely feel any part of his right arm and hand. Only a dull, throbbing pain that made him want to puke. He staggered, his face pale. It seemed that he couldn’t stay upright anymore, and his legs gave out from under him. He was falling...

....And then being caught by a pair of strong arms. He looked up weakly into the face of Gourry, who was holding him upright. Lina and Amelia were on either side of him, assessing his condition.

“Zel! Hey, Zel!” Lina shook him gently as he nearly lapsed into unconsciousness. “Zel, what happened? I thought you were just going for a new sword!”

“Were you attacked?” Amelia asked. “Did you fight it, Mr. Zelgadis? Did you defeat it thanks to your heart filled with a love for justice?”

“It--it was a demon,” Zel whispered tiredly. The darkness was calling to him, and he felt weak. He wanted to sleep, but he knew that he couldn’t. “It tried to...we have to stop it.” The darkness began to engulf his vision, and he knew that he was losing consciousness. Desperately, he latched onto Lina’s arm. “Lina....please. Kill me. It’s the only way.”

Then he sank down into the darkness and slept, leaving his companions to ponder his last sentence.

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